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[Her hand slips away from his knee as his eyes do, and she balls it into a fist in her lap.

She looks shocked at those words, figures she should be used to it now because a few people have said as such. Eventually a blush takes hold and she plucks at her wristband, frustrated.]

I'm not. He's much easier to get along with, I think. He's much more like his dad.

Minato said once that we're a family of shinobi. I'm doing this because I think if we just listen a bit more to others, try to do something more than just fight then maybe something else, something better will come from it. I don't know. It's worth a try.

And it wasn't all fake. Most of it was, it's true, but I think some of it was real too. [It's just hard to forget he's killed a lot of people. She stops and shoots him an awkward smile.]

You're the one supposed to be talking, not me.

I... have some memories of Minato, now, but I still mostly remember you, and Naruto... he's just like my friend Yahiko, in his ideals. And that follows what you just said, to listen and reach out with open hands.

[He lifted his chin, looking back to her face, and straightened up some, hesitating a moment before reaching to very lightly touch the back of her fisted hand.]

I wanted nothing more than to make that dream a reality, to bring peace to the world, and I fumbled it all horribly. So I gave that into Naruto's keeping, I fixed my last wrong, confident that he would be able to do what I was too weak to.

When I was revived, he'd grown by bounds Kushina, it was a staggering difference and he was so much more peaceful than when I met him the first time, stronger than even then. It was knowing that was the case that let me no longer be a danger and able to let go so I couldn't be used against anyone anymore in that battle. Even someone else trying to control my body hadn't been enough to overcome that for long.

And then I came here, healthier than I've been... in over a decade. I only looked like this again briefly during the fight with Naruto, the more recent one, but before that? I was a ruined thing, skeletal and having worn myself to the point where a simple jutsu was enough to kill me instead of me having enough that I might have lived through it. I tended to never go outside, never really slept, and it worried Konan terribly. But I was blind to what it did to me because my country and goals were more important, at the time.

I never truly thought of what they would do in the instance of my demise.

[He paused, then shook his head once, meeting her gaze.]

But the point, Kushina, is that when I've spoken to you, it's not been so different from speaking to him, though by now we've had an almost equal number of conversations as with him.

[As he touches her, she has the gut reaction to pull away but the continued speech keeps her there.

If Naruto's growth to Naruto was staggering then what was it to see a baby turn into a strong, young man. She knew it would happen, she had wished so hard to see him grow up and got that wish here in Luceti. Guilt still sits heavy in her gut, she had never gotten to tell Naruto how sorry she was yet, for everything.

Yet he grew into everything they could hope for, in a son. Sure, he was a bit of a brat when it came to chores and eating vegetables but he was still a teenager. Teenager as he was, even Nagato had seen his growth in a short time frame.

And now he's carrying everyone's dreams, Minato's and Kushina, Nagato's, Jiraiya's... and he's still standing tall. Still bickering with her and only getting a little off-balance by these experiments. Well, that's what she's here for. To keep him upright and moving forward and not to dwell too much.]

He did get his weird verbal quirks from me. [STILL MISSING THE POINT KUSHINA or she's just deflecting because she still hopes he's more like his dad. And she's stubborn as all get out.]

Konan is a nice girl. Try not to worry her so much anymore, Nagato. Take care of yourself. People make mistakes so don't give up on your dreams either if you still really want peace in this world. The thing about Luceti is it's good at giving us second chances. It's got some problems too like the Malnosso but you can't give up. If you do, I'm not sure we can be friends at all.

Just do it the right way, this time. Without killing anyone.

[He saw her twitch, but he only pulled his hand back when she stopped talking. For a moment, he wasn't sure what to say, but he finally just straightened his back and looked her in the eye. She might be stubborn, but he was more than capable of being stubborn as well.]

I intend to. First will be steps with those I haven't wronged, and then the steps with those I have. Or in your case, perhaps some I have first.

[And then he tried a smile himself, because being miserable never helped anything. Really, really never helped anything.]

Ah -- I don't like waiting.

[And there was a lot she had to say and ask. Sitting there idly and waiting for Nagato to come to her just wasn't going to happen. She was already about to burst before now.

Naruto definitely got the impatience from her, too.]

That much I do recall from recent events. [He paused, hesitant, watching her, then almost... fidgeted.]

How... accurate was that world? About you?

[Her expression turns a bit blank, defensive. She doesn't like talking about herself unless she has to.]

Not much. I married Minato and had Naruto, that much was still the same. But everything else?

[The history, her family, her home, being a jinchuriki]

I was still me, though. I don't think that will ever change even with a fake life.

That was what I was asking. [His tone was soft, and he looked away after a moment.]

That was someone I could have been, but never was, for me.

...

I've never been so boring in my life.

[He flashed her a slightly awkward smile.]

[There's a bit of a head tilt, brow furrowed.]

You weren't boring.

[The look that garnered wasn't convinced at all.]

Kushina, much as I might have wished not to be, I was. At the very least I thought I was, given how.... quickly I pounced on the idea of anything beyond my normal life.

I was one of the first ones out there scouting once people started getting rounded up. Without more than the barest glimmer of my real memories, the peaceful life I had was pushed to the side for the sake of a leader I've been. Ten years leading a destitute country seems to have far more influence than a seeming thirty five years of living peacefully.

Not everyone did the same.

Edited 2013-09-16 17:22 (UTC)

Like I said, you weren't boring. Being boring doesn't mean you have a simple life or that it's nothing like another person's life.

You weren't boring to me. And I can't think my life was boring either.

Do you think creating life was boring? It's a lot better than killing people!

Of course not. I didn't mean it like that at all. I didn't mean the life was boring Kushina. I... I want the life so much.

[He pressed his hand over his heart and dipped his head, trying to find the words to explain this properly.]

But who I was there... I was bland. I had no drive, and even the passion for history that I had seemed to falter in the face of a sense of more. Not of danger. Just... being needed for something important.

My accomplishments in that world, those memories, were all family, and I treasure that... but they're not accomplishments I've ever actually done. I've never raised a child. I've never married. I never had a sibling. I had Konan, Yahiko, and Sensei, and I was a leader, but a leader has to keep themselves held a little away if they want to be objective, so while I was so proud of what my people did in Ame... I wasn't exactly included in it.

[He stalled out, looking to his lap.]

I don't... believe I'm explaining this properly, am I?

Edited 2013-09-16 22:29 (UTC)

No.

[A sigh.]

You were important and you weren't boring. It was a fake life but it was still you. Your responsibilities were just different. Did you feel boring before you knew about the truth?

Or were you happy?

[That drew him up short, and he gave her a slightly wide eyed look, turning his head to do so.]

I... had my moments when I'd get frustrated knowing that I was boring the life out of various family or colleagues even, but... that does not mean I wasn't happy, no.

[She remembers. Sort of. It's fake but the memory is there. Some of it is fading over time but those feelings don't.]

But that doesn't mean you're boring.

I don't see how anybody can be. We're all different people with likes and dislikes, different experiences. We're the same that way, I guess. And some of us might not get along or like the same things, but doesn't make you any less interesting. Doesn't make you any less unique.

Shouldn't make you less happy, either.

[He stared at her for a moment, then finally, the look of wide eyed shock eased and he dipped his head.]

I don't know why we were made siblings for those memories... but... even if they're not real, you were a wonderful sister that I was lucky to have. I wish I'd met you before, at any point.

[They're touching words and he reminds her why she came here in the first place.

Sometimes, bad things happen to people and they make mistakes. That's the sort of thing, she's seeing right now with Nagato.

Her hand settles gently on his shoulder. To show she feels the same.]

Well, we've met now. So we can make the most of it here.

[That drew his gaze back to her, a smile coming to his lips as he took a deep breath, inclining his head gravely.]

You're right, of course. There is nothing to do but move forward. I hope that some day we can be truly close.

[Like a brother and sister. She returns the smile a little, but not the sentiment since she's still not sure how to feel.

At least she can offer her ear and maybe he'll change her mind.]

I should get going. I've got a couple of boys to feed.

... Thanks for talking to me, Nagato.

[The smile faltered a little, then he gave a sharp nod.]

Of course, Kushina. I shouldn't keep you...

But feel free to come back any time.

[She stands from the couch and then moves to the door pull her shoes back on, pausing at pulling it open.]

I'll come back. I don't know when but I will. Okay?

But could you tell Konan I said hi?

[He got to his feet, suddenly awkward as he watched her prepare to leave... so all he did was nod, giving her a lopsided smile.]

Of course. Then... I guess I'll see you.

Thanks.

[Here, is one more genuine. But pretty lopsided, too.]

See you.

[And she's off!]

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